From Muddy Brown to Pure White

Here you can see some of the destruction that will have consequences for a long time. Of the three bridges on the Amlan river that we know of, only one survived.
The after effects of the typhoon Sendong are considerably broad. Houses, livestock, books, beds, and even lives, were swept away by the fury, speed and intensity of the typhoon. Many of the people we hauled rice and supplies into had their tummies filled, and then there was a spiritual hunger that surfaced, which the missionaries soon filled with the gospel of Jesus Christ.

The bridge above was once the means of crossing the river for many people. With it out, alternative means were needed to get workers, school children and any others who needed to do errands across the river. The natural solution is the bamboo pedi-barge with small children as the power supply.



The first foray to find members on the other side. River was still muddy and high.

Up river from the city of Amlan, on either side of the Amlan River, there are many houses. One thing that we are so amazed at here is that people live everywhere. If there is a spot that is not cultivated or with big signs that says, “No Trespassing”, people put up residence there. I am sure there are many land owners that allow the building, because there is high density housing here in many spots even though this a mostly rural area.

Members and missionaries and the captain and crew (the 4 little kids)

The mother who Elder Cropper, the missionaries, and members were heading to find was baptized years ago, but has not been attending—too difficult with her husband not involved and the distance to travel, but she and her husband read from the bible daily, trying to stay close to the Savior, with not much support.

In fact, the branch members did not have her on the list to find after the flood because she had been lost track of. One of the men who has recently come back to church is the one who baptized her, so he said we should go there, and he went with us to show us the way to their house.

Sister Joy, in front, is so happy for troops to arrive. Their damage was not extensive, but it was their remoteness that was their problem for getting supplies.

Our first time across the river was to supply rice and make sure the members who lived over there were safe and fed. You will notice the bags on the barge in the earlier picture. We all couldn’t fit on the barge at one time without sinking it. As we walked in, everyone was so nice. We found the family we were looking for.

The first time we saw this family, just days after the flood, they were so gracious, mostly because the man who baptized her was with us. He really hit it off with the father who immediately started taking the missionary discussions. Two great elders from the mission taught them faithfully, and four weeks later the dad was baptized after quitting smoking and a few other vices. They’ve been attending church as a family, finding new friends there, getting help in the teaching of their children, enjoying fellowship with the saints.







a zoom in close up of kids on the far side of the river showing off for us on a later trip.












The crew is down to these 2 little guys, but the river is much narrower, cleaner, and not so raging.














Crystal not so sure about the big white lady.












Still shy













But see how Crystal feels about her father?

We went with the missionaries last week for a last discussion before baptism. We sat in the front room of their two room home. We sat down on the bamboo floor and taught them a discussion on how the scriptures can become a working part of their family gospel teaching. Gave them a few examples of how Lehi loved and taught his family specific things relating to the gospel. We read some scriptures from the Basahon ni Mormon, his English is a bit weak. And our Visayan is extremely weak.

The whole family (plus a cousin in the neighborhood) ready for a new birth and a new life.

I wish we had a picture of them with their Dad in white baptismal outfit. That's the pure white part, but we could not be there for the baptism, so we saw pictures but don't have any for you to see.







the trip home Ya, I trust these guys.

This family, recently just struggling along spiritually, is now empowered. The parents both now have the saving ordinance of baptism by authority and the gift of the Holy Ghost to guide them in raising their family. The father will soon have the priesthood and will be able to exercise that priesthood to baptize his son in a few months when he turns eight.

So, a man baptizes a lady who understands the gospel. He then leaves the church for a time. And so does she. A Branch Pres., concerned for the man, suggests we find him. We do so and invite him back. He agrees that it is time for his family to receive the blessings of the church, he returns to the Branch family, and he helps with flood relief and remembers the lady who has been forgotten, she and her husband respond to the love extended, and they are now enriched by the gospel as a whole family. This is just one of the countless cycles that Heavenly Father has going on in different phases all over the planet—everywhere, God’s children respond to God’s love as shown by others of God’s children, they in turn lift and encourage others, and on it goes.

We love picturing all of you as part of these cycles of loving and being loved. Thank you for all you do for us, so that we can be participating in such a hands on way. You are part of the cycle.

Happy Birthday Eliza

ELIZA IS
5!!!

It seems like you have been five for a long time. We can’t believe you are only turning five today, because you have been smart enough for five since you were three!!

We are sending you some pictures with a birthday wish from a girl who has your same name. Eliza. She is only turning 3, not five, but she too is smarter than her age. She is a girl who goes to church with us.

When we asked her Mom and Dad if we could come take her picture for your birthday email, they said yes and they dressed her in her fanciest dress so she would look her prettiest to wish you happy birthday,








Girls and boys here live in very small houses and they do not have hot water in their houses. If they want hot water for washing their dishes, they make a fire and put a pot of water over the fire and heat the water till it is hot. So, most children do not get warm showers. They stand in a bucket and their mom or dad pours water over their heads to rinse off the soap and shampoo.







Eliza's favorite toy is her Hello Kitty which is in the picture. It stays on a high shelf in her house and can only come down on special occasions, like today for your birthday.
Because her name is the same as yours, she reminds us of you, even though she looks very different. Her mom and Auntie call her Lyly for short, or Ely

Did you know that there are almost no horses on the island where we live? We only saw one horse and it was a little kind of horse and it was pulling a cart with a man in the cart and the man was earning money by taking people places in his pony cart. I wish we had a picture for you to see it. Other than that we never saw a horse here. The people here have cows (baca)—but their cows are different than ours—and they have caribou, which looks like a big bull with horns—even the girl ones have horns— and lots of goats (kanding), pigs (baboy), and chickens (manok), but no horses anywhere that’s why I never learned the word for horse here.

Kids here don’t have much time to play because their schools are very long and very strict, and when school and homework is done there is still not much time for play, because there is much work to be done, like feed the chickens and the pig, go buy the charcoal to cook dinner with, and then start the fire and cook the rice for dinner. Even little kids your age do important things to help their family, like buying food at the little store near their house.

But when they do play, they like to swim in the rivers, fly kites, go fishing, and play with toys. They don’t have hardly any toys, but some have dolls, stuffed animals, or trucks.

We are so happy when we hear about what you are doing—your riding lessons and everything, so, thank you for your letters when your mom writes us emails.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR ELIZA!!!

From Grammy and Grampy

Happy Birthday Melissa!

Happy Birthday dear Melissa

We can’t begin to tell you how much we miss you and your dear husband and babes. Our lives have been so closely intertwined these last many years, that you have become part of the normal ebb and flow of breath and time, like you were just a part of us. We could hardly make a decision without consulting you, at least for calendaring purposes, if not for participation and help. So here we are, thousands of miles away, without benefit of your sharp, clear vision, and without access to the joyful moments and/or hectic events that have become so valued, so dear. We miss you Melis, and can’t really think about it very much, or it’s just too big a hole to walk around with.

With each of the grand-kids' birthday posts so far, I’ve told them something I thought would be of particular interest to them, so I’ll do the same for you—a couple of little human interest stories-- illustration of life here, and perspective for life there.

The first one is just funny. We went weeks ago to see an elderly couple who had not been to church for ages. We hit it off, though she has almost no English. We challenged them to come back to church and prepare to go to the temple, but they were reticent, citing ill health and a huge boil on her foot that makes it hard to travel to church. I went back later and invited her to our branch R.S. dance practice. Oh she hobbled to church for that, you better believe, and had a great old time. She is big and fleshy and jolly and loves to dance. Well, once she'd been for dance practice, she had little excuse to miss the real deal, so now they mostly come. So this week, I walked in to the chapel about 10 minutes early, which here is like arriving the day before. She was already there and she had a big old bottle of rum next to her! The branch's first counselor's wife was sitting next to her laughing and trying to peel off the label. I walked up to shake their hands, and they hastily assured me that this was not rum, that is was just water with something added for her boil which was acting up. She was laughing, the other woman was too, and of course I thought it was hilarious. I said "oh, so it's medicinal." They nodded emphatically, giggling all the while. I chose not to open it for a whiff--best not to know. Finally they gave up on the label peeling attempt and wrapped a handkerchief around the unmistakable bottle. The questions arise: was this indeed "medicinal"? Was it actually rum in sacrament meeting? What is the optimal ratio of rum to water for treating a boil? If there was no rum involved, where did the bottle come from for the "medicine"? and finally, "Why was she not sharing?" She just chortled away, grabbing me once in a while to give me a big squooshy hug and waggle her head, knowing the irony of it all, and feeling felling no pain.

I'm not sure why that story came to mind for your birthday post, but I think because it is a story that the Stout in you would particularly enjoy. In fact, if Laren were to read this, you now he would smuggle a rum bottle filled with water into your mom's handbag next Sunday--maybe even use it to fill the sacrament cups.

Yesterday, we met for the first time the woman who serves as the District Young Women President. The District is as big in terms of members as a stake, with probably as many young women, though there are only 4 branches. Sister S. is a returned missionary, a VERY important distinction here, just turned 40, and has been married for 8 years. She has been serving in this calling since before she was married—10 years!! And has always had a branch calling or 2 or 3 also. She has seldom had her presidency fully staffed in one time, and she said when I met with her, that this was the first time she had ever had a one-on-one training session in all that time. She orchestrated the participation by her District youth in a huge cultural event in Cebu last year along with the temple dedication, plus a 3 day youth conference celebrating the jubilee year-50 years of the church in the Philippines. She pulls off this kind of thing in a place where her youth have no transportation of their own, nor money for fare to get anywhere, nor phones to communicate. And yet it all seems to happen.

Sister S is married to the branch president of a branch with 700 plus members on the records and about 120 attendance!! He too has been in his calling for 10 years!! They have been trying for their whole married life to have children, but can’t so far, and this last year after 8 years of waiting, she had 2 pregnancies that both ended in miscarriages.

She and her husband arrive at church (her only day off) early, and they just literally camp out there all day every Sunday. They bring a lunch and she sometime puts two tables together and has a nap (no couches or stuffed chairs here) while he is working in his office and meeting with people. She says she prefers it to going home because it is so peaceful in the church, but at her house the neighbors are too near and loud and it doesn’t feel like the Sabbath so she just stays at church all day.

It is so interesting how each of us has our own trials. This woman’s life is opposite from yours in many ways. She aches for kids, and you have a clan. She buys a tiny sack of groceries every day for her and her husband, while you need 2 carts at your weekly Winco extravaganza. You have financial security, and almost no discretionary time. She works 6 days a week, still has next to nothing financially, but can hang out all day at church on a Sunday because she is not needed anywhere else. You have too much to manage. She has too little. With all those differences, I know you two would hit it off. You are both delightful and very real.

In every realm and country, yours and hers, life is just plain hard for lots of different reasons. The miracle is that in households all over the world, women like you and like Sister S find the beautiful moments, make choices to add peace and beauty to their lives, and nurture the people around them-- in their families or the communities or their callings.

We applaud you Melissa for doing all of that. You are magnificent in your capacity as wife and mother. You are dependable and stalwart and beautiful. You are steadfast and immovable. How did all that come in the same package? Thanks for all you do to make it possible for us to be here--the mail, the bills, the banking, the house stuff. And thanks even more for the dedicated wife and mother you are for our son and grandchildren. We love you immensely and . . .

We wish you a hugely happy birthday !!

Long Winded Thanks

If you know me well, you know that I am intrigued by and struggle with the existence of paradox—two ideas that are opposing, or that are at opposite ends of a continuum, but that are both, nonetheless, true. “How can that be? Can two opposing things be true?” one might ask. Well, yes, there are tons of examples, and, I would suggest that paradox exists because to God there is neither beginning nor end of time, space, and, continuums. What seems to us like two opposites are really just parts of the same whole when looked at from a divine viewpoint. In Eastern philosophy, this idea is captured in the concept and symbol of yin and yang, and is generally accepted, but our Western sensibilities, mine included, have a hard time letting go of our dualistic, hierarchical pattern of organizing—a right and a wrong, a lesser and a greater.

I’m being too theoretical, so let me give you an example of a paradox that troubles me and that has, since we have come here, become more visible and immediate than ever: it is the paradox that God commands us to work toward a Zion society, where all are pure in heart, and where there are no poor among us. The early saints in His church had all in common, and the consequences of holding back from giving all were grave. But at the same time, God makes it very clear that if we keep His commandments, we will prosper in the land, and He is also clear that at least part of that prospering includes material things that have no intrinsic value in terms of feeding or clothing people, but things that exist solely for their beauty or the pleasure of His children. He wants to give us blessings of beauty and pleasure to our senses. And then, paradoxically again, this precious prosperity generally becomes a curse, not a blessing, as it warps people and makes them forget the source.

My solution to the discomfort that comes from the existence of paradox, or, worse still, this kind of circling of truth, is to militantly fight for balance, playing both sides against each other as best I can, while maintaining some sort of middle ground. I stand there in the middle, trying to stay upright, and I wobble one way and then the other, while some seem able to embrace the whole continuum and function all around it. I wonder: should I give all I have away—physical and spiritual, holding nothing back; should I guiltily indulge in the pool I get to swim in or the mango I can afford, while doling out rice and getting praise for that pittance as if I’m a saint; should I spread happiness through true doctrine that lifts, sprinkling random gifts that are unexpected and unconnected to survival, while enjoying with gratitude some of the pleasures I have been blessed (or cursed) with?

In practice in the Philippines this means for me that I am always deciding, in each moment how to think about and behave about the fact that I get to eat chocolate every day if I choose, when the people around me can feed their whole family lunch for the cost of that chocolate bar. If you use the beach-stranded starfish metaphor, where you can’t save all the starfish, but you can make a difference for the one you are tossing back from the beach to the ocean, then every day I am saving starfish, but also deciding not to save others. Am I not? And it’s much more complicated than that, because, by tossing a starfish back (in this case, giving them the cost of the chocolate bar, say) are you really saving them, in any real way, or are you cursing them by aiding their dependence or sense of entitlement?

So, as I said before, I stalwartly struggle to stand in the middle. I pray for guidance to know what help is actually helping. I study scripture to find models for what we are facing. I look to church policy and practice which is at the same time both amazingly generous and also very disciplined, and then I try to practice, in a micro sort of way, what I feel directed to do.

The most recent starfish that we found at our feet was in the form of a dear old man who had just lost his wife. He needed financial help to bury her. The branch president came to Elder Cropper for counsel as to how to handle it, because he couldn’t find it addressed in the church hand book—can a branch use fast offering funds for this purpose? Elder Cropper (after rejoicing that the handbook is now being consulted) counseled him to ask the immediate family to all stretch and pitch in to help—he has 8 adult kids. I then suggested that he remind the husband and children that it is a privilege and an honor to honor the dead by stretching and even sacrificing to bury them, not elaborately, but respectfully. (Let me point out here that the total cost the family was looking at, though huge to them, was very small from our point of view, and we could have offered to foot the bill without much of a stretch—under $200.00). We then told the branch president that if the family could not or would not help their dad, then he, the branch pres., should pray to know how to proceed; since it was not outlined, yeah or nay, it was his call as directed by the Spirit.

All this was certainly a learning process for the branch president, and a growing process for the family, and who knows what positive out comes there might be from not just having the branch pres, or us, just hand over the funds without question. But still, I had to struggle to stay upright, knowing this man had so little and I have so much. Oh, and the other important detail is that the man and his wife were the only members of the church in their family—none of their children believed as they did, and each came with his or her own ideas about how our church ought to help, and they were certainly making judgments about their dad’s church based on the outcome.

When we went to the viewing, which occurs, as is the custom here, in the entry porch of the house, which is hung with sheets and curtains all around, the family were all gambling and drinking under a tarp that had been strung up outside the viewing room. The old father looked so alone and forlorn and vulnerable, sitting next to his wife’s casket while his children and grandchildren reveled just outside. We did not know the outcome of his request or the response. But the man approached us and now asked directly for our help, since folks here don’t differentiate really well between the church leadership and the missionaries, especially since Elder Cropper is now serving in both capacities. So, Elder Cropper explained again the process, said this was between the man and his branch president, and that we as missionaries were not allowed to help directly in any financial way.

Then we stayed a long time, teaching eternal truths of comfort and solace, but as I walked away, I couldn’t help myself, and I took aside a woman from the branch who I know to be both discreet and wise. I handed her some bills and asked that she put them quietly in to the collection box next to the casket. I explained to her why the anonymity and secrecy, and I trusted her to understand—as well as it can be understood, since I don’t understand it. I just had to toss the starfish. Even though I know there is an order to things and even though tossing it might be bad for it in some crippling way.

And so don’t we all play at godhood, with our infinitely tiny viewpoints, and we try to find the balance in the paradox?

All that said, let me state emphatically, on a different note, but the same topic, that I am awed by the generosity of each of you. I applaud with all my heart the very tangible and miraculous way in which so many gave to the flood victims here, by helping repair and refurnish their school. I have no conflicted feelings about all that was accomplished, at Bio-os Elementary School, through your donations. That was pure truth—good people coming together—financially in the case of those from far, and physically in the case of those who were here, to reestablish a place of learning and growth. Through that process, I learned so much about the power of spontaneous love and goodness. I never wondered for a second about paradox; rather, I felt sure footed and supported.

Thank you. Again. And Again--on behalf of the school, the parents, the children, and . . .

Thank you for helping to steady us—to allow us to find a place of balance in this rather topsy-turvy corner of the world. Our sense of balance is an extremely handy and hugely appreciated side effect of your generosity. It has helped me see some of the whole continuum of what Zion means in practice.

May God continue to bless us all, as he always so generously does. (Another paradox—He asks us to ask for blessings, when He has already given beyond our capacity to ever comprehend or express gratitude for. (Hmmmmm).

Some rather random and unconnected pictures:

Picture #1 below, on our the way back from delivering some rice to a family who lost their house in the typhoon.

Next, the back yard of a member who collected some coconuts and put them in her back yard and just watched them sprout. Coconut trees are amazingly productive and everything on the tree can be used.

Followed by MA coming face to face with one of the locals on our way to a members house. Obviously in the middle of no where. Well, actually up ahead and a little to the right in the coconut trees. It rained hard just before we left. Although, the boots do make a great fashion statement

newer school post

Our most recent post, about school starting, posted as if it was before, Deanie's birthday because we started it, then wrote and posted his, then went back to the school one. So, if you are looking for the most recent update about the school, scroll down past the birthday. Thanks all

Deanie's birthday post

It's hard to read, but Tanner and Melissa, could you tell Deanie that the sign says:
Dean is three, 3, tulo, III--so it says "three" four different ways. And it says Happy Birthday on the side.
Dear Dean,
We had a great time today thinking of you and planning a place to take our birthday picture for you. We chose to do it right next to the ocean where we live. It was really windy today and some boys about Simon's age were flying a kite right near us. It was up so high you could hardly see it!
It is almost always windy here by the ocean--sometimes just a breeze, sometimes really howling winds. You can see the ocean behind us, and behind that is another island, the island of Cebu. We traveled there by boat one time. We just drove our truck up to the boat, then drove on to the boat over a ramp, then the ramp went up and the boat chugged along to Cebu island. Then we drove off, and drove up the rode over there. It's really fun on the boat because it rocks and rolls around in the waves.
Grampy and I are happy that we get to see you on the computer sometimes. You are getting so big, and now that you are three you must be even bigger!
Did it snow there yet? It never, ever, ever snows here and the children don't even know what snow looks like or feels like and they don't know about being cold. They are never freezy cold here, even outside at night.
We love you Dean and wish you a very happy birthday.
Love always,
Grammy and Grampy

School Started!

Daghan Salamat Kaayo. Visayan for, Really big thank you very much!

School started Monday! We wished you could have been here to hear all of the thank you's from children, teachers, parents picking up their children, and anyone else who happened to be there. We felt that you were a little cheated that we heard all the thank you's and expressions of gratitude and you didn't. So we will try to pass it along with pictures. Children, parents, and teachers would shake our hands, give thumbs up, or high 5, knowing that's American style, but others took our right hand and put it to their forehead, Filipino style: A blessing.

Managing funds and accountability are of the highest priority here. Just to make a deposit all of the signers on the account need to be present. So Mary Anne and I went to the bank with the PTA president, the school treasurer and the school principal to make the deposit. We had been to the pawn shop a couple of times ( yes, "pawn shop", see an earlier post for that explanation) and had 88,000 pesos in a money pouch. The PTA president and I were sitting at the bank president's desk in the bank and when I pulled the money out of the pouch and laid it on the desk, he looked at the pile of cash and his eyes and face melted with gratitude. I was a bit surprised at how much he was taken back with the amount of cash that had been raised for his school. I wish I could have taken a picture at that moment so you could see the deep level of gratitude he showed. That was real. This is a big rough man who works as a security guard at night. To see that softness on his face was so different from what is usual. The PTA president is the guy in the middle in the long sleeved gray shirt. The principal is next to Mary Anne and the treasurer next to me.
Note there is a computer monitor in the foreground, but the bank pres. is at a typewriter with a big calculator next to him. Another typewriter, is in the very front of the picture. And Christmas is still everywhere. So fun.

School was back in session. About 60% of the students showed up the first day. Not quite all in uniforms yet either but that will happen soon. Everyone is just happy the school doors are open.









Like in the states, every student has a back pack. Look, their shoes are clean, as is the walkway












This little boy was so proud of his new pencil. He was just walking around carrying it. And he kept lifting it up for me to see.












This classroom was one of the worst hit. I really can't believe it got put back together so that classes could start. These people are such hard workers and so many of them showed up that a lot of work got done that we didn't expect could happen.







The boy in the middle is giving the sign for "quapo". That means handsome. I am not sure whether he was saying he was handsome or he was giving me a compliment. I think the former.











New book and new pencil. This boy was so into writing he wouldn't even look up.













So embarrassed to have their picture taken.














The steps are broken up asphalt. A few days earlier the asphalt was part of the national highway that is under construction about 1 mile from the school. On the work day, men hauled it off the roadside where it had been dug up, and missionaries and others helped place it here to make this path passable.








This is the classroom of the teacher we made original contact with when considering the cleanup and help. She teaches 2nd grade. My camera was a bit of a distraction in her class. I am happy I didn't get a ruler over my knuckles










A clean walkway.









School is out and off some of the students go home.....through the lapok (mud) outside the school grounds.















The schools are so underfunded that when there is a disaster like this the teachers are required to replace all of the tools like maps, globes, chalkboards, etc. out of their own funds. They can get a loan from the district emergency fund but then have to repay it. so, some of your donations went directly to teachers. These teachers are tearfully happy about the 2000 pesos ($38) that they received to replace their "devices" with no pay back. Money is so tight here. An average teacher salary is 20,000 pesos per month. That is about $350/month. The good news is that the $38.00 will go a long way in replacing what they lost.
They kept saying thank you and in this picture, a few of them said it to you, together. "Please tell the people from our hearts how much thank you we feel to them."

In addition to the funds already spent, and that given to teachers, there is a chunk still in the PTA account. It will be used for carpenters, plumbers and materials to repair toilets and wood framing and to build shelves up high out of flood range. There is still more we have not distributed, and lots and lots more work that needs doing. They need an engineer to design and build a wall to divert the river in the next flood. They have one started, but it's not complete. They need a new sound system so they can sing and pray together in the mornings. There is a second school in the district, not as badly damaged, but still with lots of loss, that we will visit and see if we can divert some funds to them too. So, all will be well and directly used.
We can not thank you enough. Your generosity and love for God's children whom you have never seen is humbling
Many have said how wonderful we are to be organizing this and doing some of the dirty work, but honestly we feel almost inanimate in the whole process, like we are just being used as tools to connect people who care with people who need, and to allow people who could feel forgotten to feel that there really is a God and he has not forgotten them. It is a very gratifying work, and the thanks and praise feel really great, but they also feel ill-aimed. At the risk of sounding biblical, Praise God from whom all blessings flow. Our thanks go out, with those of every member of the Bio-os community, to you and to God.